Not a Chip off the Old Block

When your boss says she is proud of your work, you feel she is taking a little bit of credit for your accomplishment. In contrast, you feel differently when a colleague hears of your accomplishment and says, "That is amazing! I really admire what you did there."

Admiration is something you have for someone who has done something amazing on their own, typically something that is beyond you.

Even if you love your children and are proud of them, there is something else they need from you: admiration. When you tell your children "I love you," they feel safe. When you tell your children "I am proud of you," they feel approval. When you tell your children "I admire you," they feel identity, power, freedom, and personal pride—the same emotions you feel when another adult tells you that they admire you.

Your children need your admiration, your acknowledgment that they are becoming something beyond you.